With the busy-ness of my life recently, as well as the minor computer troubles I've had, I realize I haven't done the best at communicating with you all. So, here's a brief outline of what the next 5 weeks look like for me:
July 13: Staff 1 arrive
July 17 - 26: Camp 1
July 27: Staff 1 depart / Staff 2 arrive
July 31 - Aug. 9: Camp 2
August 11: Staff 2 depart
~ August 13: Kari escapes to a desert island (ok, maybe not:) to praise God for all He has done (and to regain her sanity:)
Your prayers over these next 5 weeks are much appreciated. Pray for safety, smooth travels, health, unity, and good relationships to be built. Most of all, pray that God will be glorified in all that we do, and that everyone involved in camp this summer grows closer to God.
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
Sunday, July 6, 2008
His Wounds
Since my last post, it's been a constant struggle between my anxious/stressed thoughts and the Truth - the truth that it is God who will make these camps happen, not Kari. Him, not me. I need to live in His strength. In His presence. How often I 'forget' that I have Him - His Spirit - with me all the time. I want to continually abide in His presence and rely on His Spirit. Today, tomorrow, the next 6 weeks, every day of my life.
So you know how when God is trying to teach you something - when He is seemingly "beating you over the head" with something, the idea comes up everywhere you turn? That's how my weekend has been. It started yesterday when I was having dinner with my neighbor Mari Ellen. (Aside on how thankful I am for Mari Ellen: I am so thankful that Mari Ellen is my neighbor. For her laugh. For her notes on our door. For her cups of tea. For her open door and hospitality. For her listening ear. I am thankful that at times when I am not listening to the Spirit's presence with me, God uses His Spirit in Mari Ellen to speak Truth to me. I am blessed.) I was telling Mari Ellen that because I know just how unworthy I am of God's love and grace and strength, I continue to try to live life in my own strength. Mari Ellen looked at me and said "But Kari, isn't that the point? None of us are worthy. That's why He died."
At church this morning, we had communion - another reminder of the cross and its redeeming power in my life. We started and ended communion with the song "The Power of the Cross" by Keith Getty and Stuart Townsend. (Side note: If you haven't heard any of Keith and Kristyn Getty's songs, I highly recommend that you check them out. Powerful, truth-speaking lyrics.) One line in particular caught my attention: "Oh to see my name written in the wounds." MY name. Written in HIS wounds. What a word picture! What love!
Oh, to see my name
Written in the wounds,
For through Your suffering I am free.
When I got home, I turned on some music. I just picked up where I left off the last time I listened to music. The first song that played? "By His Wounds" by Mac Powell (on the "Glory Revealed" CD):
By His wounds, we are healed...
Then, I checked my email. One of my friends included the following quote in an email from Max Lucado's book Come Thirsty:
So you know how when God is trying to teach you something - when He is seemingly "beating you over the head" with something, the idea comes up everywhere you turn? That's how my weekend has been. It started yesterday when I was having dinner with my neighbor Mari Ellen. (Aside on how thankful I am for Mari Ellen: I am so thankful that Mari Ellen is my neighbor. For her laugh. For her notes on our door. For her cups of tea. For her open door and hospitality. For her listening ear. I am thankful that at times when I am not listening to the Spirit's presence with me, God uses His Spirit in Mari Ellen to speak Truth to me. I am blessed.) I was telling Mari Ellen that because I know just how unworthy I am of God's love and grace and strength, I continue to try to live life in my own strength. Mari Ellen looked at me and said "But Kari, isn't that the point? None of us are worthy. That's why He died."
At church this morning, we had communion - another reminder of the cross and its redeeming power in my life. We started and ended communion with the song "The Power of the Cross" by Keith Getty and Stuart Townsend. (Side note: If you haven't heard any of Keith and Kristyn Getty's songs, I highly recommend that you check them out. Powerful, truth-speaking lyrics.) One line in particular caught my attention: "Oh to see my name written in the wounds." MY name. Written in HIS wounds. What a word picture! What love!
Oh, to see my name
Written in the wounds,
For through Your suffering I am free.
When I got home, I turned on some music. I just picked up where I left off the last time I listened to music. The first song that played? "By His Wounds" by Mac Powell (on the "Glory Revealed" CD):
By His wounds, we are healed...
Then, I checked my email. One of my friends included the following quote in an email from Max Lucado's book Come Thirsty:
"The big news of the Bible is not that you love God but that God loves you; notOk, Lord, I'm listening. You know me and yet You still choose to love me. May I live every moment in light of the cross, in the power of Your love.
that you can know God but that God knows you! He tattooed your name on the
palm of his hand. His thoughts of you outnumber the sand on the shore. You
never leave his mind, escape his sight, flee his thoughts. He sees the worst
of you and loves you still. Your sins of tomorrow and failings of the future
will not surprise him; He sees them now. Every day and deed of your life has
passed before his eyes and been calculated in his decision. He knows you
better than you know you and has reached his verdict: HE LOVES YOU STILL.
No discovery will disillusion him; no rebellion will dissuade Him. He loves
you with an everlasting love."
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
This is a marathon, not a sprint.
As my roommate can attest, I have experienced much anxiety recently about English Camp planning. This is my own fault. It is evidence that I am giving in to my perfectionistic tendancies and fear of failure and trying to do things in my own power, rather than depending on God and remembering that these are His camps.
Less than two weeks and our staff will be here. Two weeks from tomorrow the first group of campers arrive. This is what was causing me to feel overwhelmed yesterday. There is still much that needs to be done. That should be done. That could be done.
I needed to make myself stop. Stop and realize everything that is already in place. Stop and praise God for the amazing ways He has already provided. Stop and set realistic expectations for myself. Stop and realize what needs to be done, and what is not necessary. To appropriately prioritize.
I'm learning the hard lesson that God doesn't want me to sacrifice my health and sanity for the ministry. When you are a short-termer, it's easier to treat your ministry like a sprint - to completely pour yourself into everything you do and give 120% constantly. When it is done, you 'recover.' This is what I have been used to doing in summers past - spending 4 weeks of my summer completely pouring myself out for English Camp. Now that I am full-time staff, I can't do that. I need to treat it more like a marathon. I need to pace myself. Yes, I still want to give everything I can to English Camp, but if I don't pace myself, I won't have the endurance I need for the next 2, 6, or 7 weeks. I want to live this summer 'slow and steady,' not as 'a rat race,' so that I can observe the wonderful ways that God works, as well as stay sensitive to His Spirit.
I want this summer to shine with His glory. At the end of the summer, I don't want to look back and say 'I made English Camps happen.' Rather, I want to say 'Look what God did. See the wonderful ways He made English Camps happen and happen well!' To Him be the glory!
Less than two weeks and our staff will be here. Two weeks from tomorrow the first group of campers arrive. This is what was causing me to feel overwhelmed yesterday. There is still much that needs to be done. That should be done. That could be done.
I needed to make myself stop. Stop and realize everything that is already in place. Stop and praise God for the amazing ways He has already provided. Stop and set realistic expectations for myself. Stop and realize what needs to be done, and what is not necessary. To appropriately prioritize.
I'm learning the hard lesson that God doesn't want me to sacrifice my health and sanity for the ministry. When you are a short-termer, it's easier to treat your ministry like a sprint - to completely pour yourself into everything you do and give 120% constantly. When it is done, you 'recover.' This is what I have been used to doing in summers past - spending 4 weeks of my summer completely pouring myself out for English Camp. Now that I am full-time staff, I can't do that. I need to treat it more like a marathon. I need to pace myself. Yes, I still want to give everything I can to English Camp, but if I don't pace myself, I won't have the endurance I need for the next 2, 6, or 7 weeks. I want to live this summer 'slow and steady,' not as 'a rat race,' so that I can observe the wonderful ways that God works, as well as stay sensitive to His Spirit.
I want this summer to shine with His glory. At the end of the summer, I don't want to look back and say 'I made English Camps happen.' Rather, I want to say 'Look what God did. See the wonderful ways He made English Camps happen and happen well!' To Him be the glory!
Friday, June 27, 2008
PTL they're coming!!
Over the past year, I have been eagerly anticipating the arrival of my soon-to-be-full-time-co-workers: the Kraines. I have gotten to know this amazing family over the past few summers, and have been excited about the prospect of them coming to work here full-time. Russ will teach at BFA and Diane will be a part of our English Camp team. We have been praying that God would provide for them to be able to arrive here mid-July. Well, I received an email from them this morning saying that they have been given the official okay by JT to come in July! Praise the Lord!! Continue to pray for them - that God will continue to provide for all of their needs and everything that needs to happen during the next few weeks.
Thursday, June 26, 2008
One year
It was one year ago yesterday that I arrived in Germany, suitcases in hand, anxiously excited to start this new adventure that God had for me. It hardly seems possible that it has been a whole year already, but what a year it has been. The word rollercoaster has often come to mind. Ups and downs. Laughter and tears. Blessings and challenges. But through it all, God's faithful hand has been evident. He has carried, stretched, and grown me (and hopefully made me more like Him). I am learning more and more what it means to be His disciple.
I sat down with my journal last night and made a list of what I have learned over the past year. The thread running through it all spoke of God's goodness - His love, provision, and grace. Praise Him!
Today part of the song "Bring the Rain" (by MercyMe) is running through my head. The words are a bit scary to sing because it is basically asking God to bring the trials; but moreso, they speak the truth that who I am in Christ is unchanging. And that the purpose of my life is to bring Him glory and praise.
I sat down with my journal last night and made a list of what I have learned over the past year. The thread running through it all spoke of God's goodness - His love, provision, and grace. Praise Him!
Today part of the song "Bring the Rain" (by MercyMe) is running through my head. The words are a bit scary to sing because it is basically asking God to bring the trials; but moreso, they speak the truth that who I am in Christ is unchanging. And that the purpose of my life is to bring Him glory and praise.
Bring me joy, bring me peace
Bring the chance to be free
Bring me anything that brings You glory
And I know there'll be days
When this life brings me pain
But if that's what it takes to praise You
Jesus Bring the Rain
Bring the chance to be free
Bring me anything that brings You glory
And I know there'll be days
When this life brings me pain
But if that's what it takes to praise You
Jesus Bring the Rain
Thursday, June 19, 2008
Fully at Peace
Here it is 7:23pm and I am still sitting in my office. The blue sky and sunshine trick me into believing that it is earlier in the day. And the fact that I am being productive tempts me to keep working. This has happened too much this week. Yes, English Camp prep is important, and this is our busy time, but there is more to life than just that.
Several times this week I have thought "I need to blog about x, y, or z." But alas, it has not happened. Let me try to share a bit about what has been on my mind and heart recently....
*My amazing sister was here visiting me last week - it was WONDERFUL!! That in and of itself is definitely worthy of its own post, which will happen once I actually have downloaded my pictures.
*My computer is basically dead at this point. But my adventurous roommate and I are trying to revive it. So far, we've been partially successful. Part of me thinks it is sad how dependent my life (work and communication) is on a computer, but PTL for providing another computer at the office for me to use, so my English Camp work is not interrupted! (Any odd characters that appear are due to the fact that I'm still adjusting to the German keyboard:)
*Life has been full recently. With English Camp prep. With saying good-bye to BFA friends, (some temporarily and some that I might not see again this side of eternity). With my sister's visit. With other adventures. With trying to make the most of every moment.
*My heart is at peace because I serve an amazing God who has blessed my socks off. Sometimes I'm tempted to think that at 26 I'm old, but recently I've been struck with how short 26 years really is, and how many amazing things I've been able to experience at this 'young age.' No it hasn't always been an easy road, but I am blessed. And if God gives me one or maybe even 2 more sets of 26 years, I am speechless because I cannot begin to imagine what adventures and blessings those future years hold. But I am also excited because I feel potential....the potential that God is going to allow me to witness or be a part of BIG things. How can I help but be excited and joyous about that?! (And no, I don't have any idea what those things might be.:)
*I'm challenged and inspired and excited as I meditate on Oswald Chamber's thoughts about "reckless abandon." (Check out "My Utmost For His Highest" June 18th or click here.)
*I've been reminded that God cares more about me BE-ing than me DO-ing. Even though the next two months will contain a lot of do-ing, I pray that I remember to BE. (As in "Be still and know that I am God.") To just BE in His presence.
Thank you for being part of my life. For allowing God to use you in my life in so many ways. I am truly blessed in the people I know. Thanks for being part of this incredible journey I am on.
Several times this week I have thought "I need to blog about x, y, or z." But alas, it has not happened. Let me try to share a bit about what has been on my mind and heart recently....
*My amazing sister was here visiting me last week - it was WONDERFUL!! That in and of itself is definitely worthy of its own post, which will happen once I actually have downloaded my pictures.
*My computer is basically dead at this point. But my adventurous roommate and I are trying to revive it. So far, we've been partially successful. Part of me thinks it is sad how dependent my life (work and communication) is on a computer, but PTL for providing another computer at the office for me to use, so my English Camp work is not interrupted! (Any odd characters that appear are due to the fact that I'm still adjusting to the German keyboard:)
*Life has been full recently. With English Camp prep. With saying good-bye to BFA friends, (some temporarily and some that I might not see again this side of eternity). With my sister's visit. With other adventures. With trying to make the most of every moment.
*My heart is at peace because I serve an amazing God who has blessed my socks off. Sometimes I'm tempted to think that at 26 I'm old, but recently I've been struck with how short 26 years really is, and how many amazing things I've been able to experience at this 'young age.' No it hasn't always been an easy road, but I am blessed. And if God gives me one or maybe even 2 more sets of 26 years, I am speechless because I cannot begin to imagine what adventures and blessings those future years hold. But I am also excited because I feel potential....the potential that God is going to allow me to witness or be a part of BIG things. How can I help but be excited and joyous about that?! (And no, I don't have any idea what those things might be.:)
*I'm challenged and inspired and excited as I meditate on Oswald Chamber's thoughts about "reckless abandon." (Check out "My Utmost For His Highest" June 18th or click here.)
*I've been reminded that God cares more about me BE-ing than me DO-ing. Even though the next two months will contain a lot of do-ing, I pray that I remember to BE. (As in "Be still and know that I am God.") To just BE in His presence.
Thank you for being part of my life. For allowing God to use you in my life in so many ways. I am truly blessed in the people I know. Thanks for being part of this incredible journey I am on.
Friday, June 6, 2008
Fixing My Eyes...
Life may be a rollercoaster at times, but I want Jesus to be my foundation, my center. Music speaks to the depths of my soul, and here are a few lines that have touched me recently:
"Here in the pow'r of Christ I'll stand."
(and the rest of "In Christ Alone" by Keith Getty & Stuart Townend)
...
"Jesus, all for Jesus,
All I am and have and ever hope to be."
...
"Be still my soul
The Lord is on your side"
...
" All I have needed
Thy hand has provided
Great is Thy faithfulness
Lord unto me"
...
"Here in the pow'r of Christ I'll stand."
(and the rest of "In Christ Alone" by Keith Getty & Stuart Townend)
...
"Jesus, all for Jesus,
All I am and have and ever hope to be."
...
"Be still my soul
The Lord is on your side"
...
" All I have needed
Thy hand has provided
Great is Thy faithfulness
Lord unto me"
...
Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth . . . but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven . . .
Matthew 6:19-20
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