An EC story

As I continue to process through and learn from this summer's English Camps, my heart desires to share with you some of the things God did this summer (even though I haven't completely sorted things out). Sure, my role involved me in plenty of crazy stories involving 4:15am fire alarms, vans with issues, and boys who refused to go to sleep at a decent hour (among other things). But that's not what is important. That's not why I love English Camp. What is important is the amazing work that God does. English Camp is an intense experience - it is definitely a battle. God is changing lives and Satan doesn't want that to happen, so he tries to work against us any way he can. (Usually in small ways that we don't immediately identify as 'a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour.')

Allow me to share with you a story...a story that has touched my heart in deep ways...a story which God has used to remind me of why He has brought me here and of the truth that He is using me in spite of myself...

Those of you who know me well know that I am most definitely a people person. However, my current role involves a lot of tasks. I realized during the second camp session (during which I was directing one of the camps) that I was having trouble balancing those two things. I was either in people mode or task mode (probably in task mode more often), but I wasn't balancing the two.

During the last night as I sat in "Etwas Mehr" ("Something More" in German - our evening chapel program), I was thinking about this. It made me sad to think that I hadn't focused on the people as much as I would have liked to. I realized I was physically, emotionally, and spiritually exhausted. My heart was heavy because I felt like I hadn't truly connected with any of the campers. And the campers are the whole reason I'm here...

We ended by singing "I Have Decided To Follow Jesus." I love that song. Its seemingly simple message is profound - it always speaks to the depths of my heart and refocuses me. (I'll spare you the explanation of the many ways and reasons it speaks to my heart.) As I sang, my heart felt heavy for the campers. Leaving camp is a very emotional experience and very hard, especially for the new believers, but for all of the campers. [Most of our campers don't have strong spiritual support systems at home. As much as being a Christian teen is hard in the US, I daresay it is harder in Germany. There are not as many "supports" (strong churches, quality youth groups, believing families, like-minded friends) here as in the US. Our campers might have one of those supports, but not usually more than one.]

As I shared a few closing thoughts with the campers, my raw emotions and heart for them was evident. God gave me the poignant and succinct words to share my heart with them - how I know it is hard for them to go home, but that we as staff care about them, and are here for them whenever they need us.

I then observed as people began to leave the room. I soon noticed that S. was still sitting in her chair, looking like something was weighing heavy on her. I approached her and gently asked if she wanted to talk. As we walked out of the large meeting room to find a quieter place to talk, I felt the depth of knowing that God was answering my prayer of connecting with a camper, even though we hadn't begun to talk! God is so good to me!

S. is not a very verbal person, but she began to share with me some extremely difficult situations she is dealing with. Tough stuff that I can't imagine dealing with. Then she said, "And my mother has MS, but you probably don't know what that is." My heart just about stopped beating. (For those of who don't know, my Mom has had MS since before my parents were married.) This is the third summer in a row that I have connected with a camper whose mother has MS. How amazing is God to use this to help me connect with these campers!

However, her mother's MS is just a small part of what S. is dealing with. Please pray for her. For strength in her journey. Here is part of an email I received from S. last week:

"I thank you so much for talking to me. I think it have been very important for me to talk about it. Now I`m trying to cope with the everyday life and I`m trying to do it with God. I made a new beginning with him and on Friday I will go for the first time to a new youth group. I really hope that I can manage my life with God, although it`s very hard because I approached my problems and I have the feeling that I can`t manage it. But every time I feel that way I have to think of your words: `` It`s too much for me and it`s too much for you, but it`s not to much for God.`` So I pray that he will help me to cope with my problems..."

That's why I'm here - for the kids and the gospel and the gospel and the kids...