Gratitude Journal #13

Enjoying Easter Monday...(which is a holiday here)...I spent the afternoon enjoying a beautiful spring day with friends.

Throughout the spring and summer, there are fields of flowers where you can go and cut flowers. It is "self-service" - cut your flowers (with the knives provided) and drop your money in the cash box. Currently, the "in season" flower is tulips. I stopped by a tulip field today, to cut some flowers, and well, had fun taking some fun spring pictures along the way.

And here's the cultural lesson that these two pictures show. Jenny and Julia, two of my campers, tell me that the first picture clearly proves that I am American. My expressive and exuberant excitement is clearly American. The second picture, according to Jenny and Julia, is much more German-like. A German (who is more reserved than an American) would say that the second picture shows that I am excited about the beauty of the tulips.

What I am thankful for:
*beautiful spring weather & sunshine
*the colors of spring - tulips, daffodils, crocuses, trees budding, etc.
*fun times with friends
*good conversation
*friends who remind me who God has created me to be
*chocolate raspberry brownies (I dug out an old favorite recipe that I haven't used in a while. And I plan to share the goodness with friends.:)
*a long weekend with some extra time to rest and focus on the cross
*my salvation. That Christ loves me enough to enough a horrible death on the cross.
*that Christ lives!
*all of the resurrection hymns that we sung on Sunday & the glorious truth that they speak of
*that my support team continues to grow and strengthen

What I want:
*to continue to get good rest
*to continue to lay down my stubborn independence and ask for help when I need it - whether that be from God or people.
*to remember the strengths that God has given me and to focus on how He wants to use me, rather than continually beating myself up over my weaknesses
*instead of wallowing in my brokenness, I want to praise God for how He works in my weaknesses and how He uses challenges to grow us
*to make good progress this week on the summer English curriculum (it would be REALLY nice to be able to finish it this week!)
*to trust God and find joy in changes and question marks, rather than letting them discourage me or cause me stress.
*to truly and accurately understand God's love for me
*"...that I may know him and the power of his resurrection..." (Phil. 3:10)

Hymn on my Mind

I love when a hymn comes to mind and it is exactly what I need to be reminded of in that moment.

Day by day and with each passing moment
strength I find to meet my trials here
Trusting in my Father's wise bestowment
I've no cause for worry or for fear
He Whose heart is kind beyond all measure
Gives unto each day what He deems best
Lovingly, its part of pain and pleasure
Mingling toil with peace and rest

In the shadow of the fall

I heard a song recently that talks about how "we live in the shadow of the fall" and that our trials and pains "will not be unredeemed." Recently, I have been very aware of the pain and difficulties of life that happen because we live in the shadow of the fall. How comforting it is to remember that God promises that He will redeem these things. These pains. These struggles. These sins. That they have purpose. That God will somehow use them to bring Himself glory.

Thank You for this promise, Lord.

Gratitude Journal #12

What I am thankful for:
*Sunshine
*Warmer temperatures (is spring finally here to stay??)
*Balsamic vinegar
*Coffee Creamer (the more fat the better:)
*Social evenings with friends
*People who speak grace and truth into my life (And don't think less of me when I can't see those things on my own)
*New friends
*Chocolate...especially Nutella
*my family

What I want:
*A clean kitchen (I have decided that there seems to be a correlation between the state of my kitchen and the state of my life. Yeah - let's just say my roomie and I have big plans to clean the kitchen this evening.:)
*To sleep through the night and to sleep well. (yes, I've had some issues with that recently) To feel rested and energized.
*Peace about a decision I need to make.
*To know when it is okay to ask for help.

Some Important Info

An Upcoming Change...

Many of you have been praying for me as I have been making decisions regarding Fall 2009. Thank you! God, in His goodness, has clearly led me as I have made these decisions. I have peace and excitement about where He is leading me! There are two main parts to these decisions. First, I have decided to make a long-term commitment to Janz Team. Second, I will be switching roles. I will work with English Camps through this summer, and then in August I will begin teaching ESL (English as a Second Language) at BFA (Black Forest Academy). For more details, please read this letter and/or contact me.

In order to make this long term commitment to JTM, I need to strengthen my financial support team. If you are interested in being a part of this ministry in that way, please download a support pledge form here or contact me.

The Next Few Months...

April and May will be busy months. Our English Camp Coordination Team is busy gearing up for the summer camps. Also, from April 9-18 I will be teaching at an Easter English Camp for 11-13 year olds. I am excited about this, but also a bit unsure what to expect since this is a different program from our summer teen camps.

I am also busy getting ready for a brief HMA (Home Ministry Assignment) from April 24 - May 22. I will mainly be in the Midwest (Ohio specifically) and would love to see as many of you as possible. Please contact me and we'll set something up!

Gratitude Journal #11

Our English Camp tshirts for this summer were delivered yesterday and my reaction was one of excitement!!

What I am thankful for:
*our 2009 English Camp tshirts have been delivered and we are super excited about them! (See pic above) Yes this is a "little thing," but it is a part of camp, and it is tangible proof than in the midst of all of the details that we are swimming in, God is causing things to fall into place for this summer
*a warm sunny day
*a new friend
*Oreos! (part of a lovely care package I received yesterday!!:)
*a good conversation this morning (and yummy coffee & treats) that helped me to refocus
*God's peace in the midst of the storms of life
*That even though things in life are unexpected to us, nothing - NOTHING - takes God by surprise
*The ability to feel and care deeply about things (even though this sometimes results in emotional roller coasters)

What I want:
*For tomorrow to be a productive Saturday
*To get the people time that I need, balanced with rest and down time
*To get things accomplished at a quicker rate than I have been recently
*God's comfort for the people I know who are hurting

It's a battle

Steve unloading groceries - Summer 2008

Steve, the newest member of our English Camp Coordination Team, arrived Thursday. PTL! Steve was a member of my 2005 and 2006 CU English Camp teams, and then was our Program Coordinator during summer 2008. He is here now for all of 2009 - to fill that Program Coordinator role as well as help with follow-up and other areas of camp. We are thankful and excited to have him here! It is amazing - and a testament to who God is - that as He grows our team, each member brings different strengths and abilities. We complement each other well. It's exciting to be a part of God's ministry in this way!

As we talked with Steve yesterday about past camp experiences and ideas for the future, I was reminded just how much of a battle this is. During camp there is an intense spiritual battle that is happening. God is at work, and Satan wants to stop it. I have experienced this battle. I have lost sleep because of this battle. I have fought this battle with prayer.

However, I have been reminded recently that this is not just a four week battle that happens in the summer. I need to be constantly bathing this ministry in prayer. I covet your prayers as well. Please be praying for this summer's staff and campers. For God's protection.

My heart has also felt heavy recently when I think of the battles that our campers are constantly fighting. Some of these battles we are aware of. Others we don't know about, but they are still happening. I think of the pressures of the German educational system. I think of the peer pressure. I think of one who battles suicidal thoughts. I think of another's youth group, who lost three girls in a car accident in January (and a fourth girl was seriously injured and faces a long road of recovery).

I know that it is not just my campers who face battles. I face battles. You face battles. We all do. I think of the economic problems. I think of those facing cancer and other illnesses. I think of those facing major decisions.

Yes, these things are heavy. It is the reality of life. But I am thankful that my God is bigger than these things. And He promises that we don't have to fight these battles alone. I have been reflecting on Exodus 18:17-18 this week:

"Moses’ father-in-law said to him, "What you are doing is not good. You and the people with you will certainly wear yourselves out, for the thing is too heavy for you. You are not able to do it alone."

God does not expect us to fight our battles alone. Praise Him for this!